I met a guy over the summer who doesn’t even live on the same continent as me. We met and got along very well, spending our days on the beach swimming and partying with friends. Essentially, it was a dream come true. But as all summer romances do at one point or another, it had to come to an end. So we said our farewells, and I ended it with a tight hug and “keep in touch” — which we did.

We started talking everyday and kept in contact even when we both started our first semesters of college. We called each other and texted “goodnight” despite our different time zones. It was sweet and comfortable, and very delusional. I got myself an international situationship, and I was lovin’ it.

The more we talked, the more I wished I could see him again. December rolled around, and when I went to visit my family with a layover in Paris, he ended up coming to visit me. I was in heaven — traveling the corniest city of love with a guy who traveled hours to come and see me. After Paris, I went to visit him again near his university. We spent a nice week together — very romantic!

Now, as I look back on the week of bliss that I had, traveling around and sightseeing with a nice boy beside me, I was impressed by how well we stayed in touch. Even though we were so far geographically, our relationship stayed close. And most of it came from where we talked in the first place: iMessage was out of the question (damn you, international numbers), and Whatsapp (who uses that?) seemed strange.

Today, it is culturally understood that communication apps are designated for certain purposes and gain stigmas. It is OK to message someone through Instagram because we can feel removed. But iMessage seems too personal. Snapchat is only for flings. These rules have different variations all over the globe, but essentially … the rules are fixed. For some, it may be weird to break from that norm and try something new. But really, who decides the rules in the first place?

The perfect segue between keeping in contact, sending a cute pic and making sure you are never left on “opened” was Snapchat. And if you are left hanging, then it is a clear answer to the state of your relationship. This aspect makes it easy to be reassured while you are getting to know each other. You could keep up a conversation, and it would not matter if you randomly sent a photo in the middle of it — it was socially acceptable in the Snapchat usage rules.

Usually, there is a big gap between how a relationship functions physically and virtually. When I saw my mystery beau again, however, there was no awkwardness because the way we had been communicated felt authentic enough. We were able to pick up where we left off like no time had passed. Communication is key, and through the right app, you can strengthen a bond and leave the anxiety behind.

So really, the start of this international European fling I had was dear old Snapchat. It made me realize how dependent I am on the technology of the modern world, and just how badly I would have fared 70 years ago. Modern dating brings such ease to staying in contact that new relationships can make it across oceans. But it also taught me to reassess the rules that we assign to social media. And I judged too quickly.

So remember, even if it feels a little cringy sometimes to use Snapchat, you never know what may come your way. Maybe the key to a new relationship starts by switching communication platforms. You might end up with a hot date in a foreign country — bon appétit.

Derin Aksoy, a freshman majoring in English, is a Pipe Dream Arts & Culture intern. 

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