This might seem like a rhetorical question like “Does the Pope shit in the woods?” But since the witching hour is nearly at hand, one must wonder if our elected officials are planning to go out and commit acts of mischief, receive candy and the like. Let’s look at a few well-known political figures and see if we can figure out what their costumes will be, shall we?
First we have New York Gov. David Paterson. One of the Three Blind Mice, maybe? … No, that’s a bit harsh. Oh! I’ve got one! Matt Murdock, better known as Daredevil!
Next on the docket, we have Rep. Michelle Bachmann. Would a “crazy cat lady” costume fit her? Perhaps. Or maybe one of the witches from Shakespeare’s Scottish play. You know the one I’m talking about.
House Minority Leader Mitch McConnell could go as … a turtle, perhaps? Oh! One of the Ninja Turtles! Well … after their days of fighting Shredder and his goons.
Arizona Sen. John McCain? He doesn’t need a costume! He’s bound to scare people out of their socks! I mean, he doesn’t know too much about the Internet, and in this day and age, the Internet can make or break campaigns. Remember what happened to his campaign after the uproar and reaction to Palin being added to the ticket, as well as her campaign-trail statements and such.
Who else is there? House Minority Whip Eric Cantor! Hrm … with his looks, I’d say that he could masquerade as Don Draper! Who doesn’t love a sharply dressed man with good hair and a good fashion sense?
What about Treasury Secretary Timothy Geithner? Bernard Madoff, maybe?
Secretary of State Hillary Clinton? Hrm … this one could be tricky. Maybe a Monica Lewinsky outfit to tease and entice Bill?
And last, but certainly not least, President Barack Obama. He’d go as himself, of course! If you saw the SNL sketch from last year, Obama went to a party dressed as himself because he didn’t believe in hiding anything.
All joking aside, I’m sure that these highlighted politicians do good work, despite the bad raps they get. I wish them a very happy Halloween.
And myself, you ask? Well … that’s a little secret between me and the people I’ve told so far.
But one thing is important. Stay safe this Halloween.
Allons-y!