To date or not to date — that is our generation’s scariest question. Luckily, there’s now a third option — the situationship! Don’t want to date them, but you want a sexual relationship and an emotional connection? A situationship is right for you!

Situationships are a relatively new phenomenon; in fact, they are only about 10 years old. The term “situationship” was originally coined by journalist Carina Hsieh in 2017 to describe hookups with emotional connections.

The first time my mother heard the term “situationship,” she laughed. The standards of her generation, the boomers, would’ve never considered an unlabeled couple socially acceptable for more than a month. Traditional courtship in the United States consisted of chaperoned meetups before formal proposals or even “going steady.” Dating used to be extremely intentional, with the end goal being marriage. Nowadays, one would be lucky to go on an official date.

So why, then, are situationships so popular? A few theories can explain the recent spike in unlabeled relationships.

First, social media makes relationships appear more expensive than they actually are, which drives people to avoid relationships altogether. Social media posts allow small windows into couples’ lives, where those on the outside peer in to see pricey trends involving surprise “boo” or “brr” baskets. And with the state of today’s economy, where it is extremely difficult to find a job and fund basic living costs, these posts create misconceptions about what relationships are like financially.

Our phones and social media keep us constantly connected, and endless scrolling on dating apps makes it extremely easy to keep one’s options open. So why don’t we all have successful, fully online relationships?

A blog by Zarnab Kamal on Mindful Connection Hub points out a few potential reasons why — most notably ghosting, breadcrumbing and the perpetual talking stage. The most unfamiliar reason, breadcrumbing, is likely the most frequent. Breadcrumbing is texting someone or giving them attention occasionally just to make sure they’re still waiting for you. While these heartbreaking tactics have been around forever, the digital age makes using them so much easier.

Even with no label, people often say it can be harder to get over situationships than relationships. Certified relationship coach Julie Nguyen notes that, unlike relationships, situationships are filled with “what-ifs” and the lack of “relationship rights” granted only to those who are official.

Situationships are generally likely to fail. Although there are no statistics yet, the majority of posts on the subreddit “r/situationships” are full of negative experiences. This isn’t to say a situationship can’t be healthy; open, clear communication about intentions can benefit both partners, allowing for a less problematic experience. The downside is that with the level of intimacy being shared, feelings often grow beyond expectations.

One thing I can credit to situationships is that you take the time to really get to know someone to their core before commitment. The intimacy of connecting so deeply with someone was previously reserved for an official relationship.

However, being in a situationship is still a relationship, despite not being able to call its ending a breakup. Ignoring the reality of the situation doesn’t erase the fact that you are in an abysmally defined relationship. As an insider, I view situationships as a “try before you buy.” You get to see the potential of a full-time relationship, without actually committing to one.

As a survivor of a year-long situationship, I can attest that although the label is missing, nothing else is.

I fear now that situationships are so mainstream that they’re here to stay. Although if you’re like me and you never want to go through something like that again, you can always set clear boundaries and intentions before moving forward with even a harmless “late-night drive.”

Deirdre Pryal is a sophomore majoring in English. 

Views expressed in the opinions pages represent the opinions of the columnists. The only piece that represents the view of the Pipe Dream Editorial Board is the staff editorial.