Dear Sarah,
These past few weeks have been filled with an exceptional amount of girl-flirting and an almost greater feeling of rejection. From formal rush to Phi Mu’s rush, I’ve become exhausted and unwanted. Before I began the process, I knew the system was hurtful, but not one of the organizations with whom I felt I had a connection gave me a bid. I’m now experiencing this painful feeling of rejection. How do I recover from feeling like no one wants me?
Sincerely,
GDI (and wishing I was proud)
Dear GDI (and wishing I was proud),
For those who don’t know, a GDI is a “God Damn Independent,” or someone who isn’t affiliated with Greek Life. Let me first start by saying formal recruitment is a hard day filled with long hours of small talk with girls who are unfortunately forced to judge you. The day begins and we tell ourselves how impersonal it can be, but we quickly forget that. We end the day reflecting on the “great” connections we feel we have made, but so do the other 200 girls.
But now it’s over and you have the power to remind yourself that it’s impersonal. The system works for some and doesn’t for others. While the rules can be fuzzy, there is one thing that is clear, and it is that the results are in no way a reflection of who you are.
If you think about it, the relationships you have formed are most likely not through formal experiences. Most are through club meetings, classes, your dorm, programs you went on and through mutual friends — not in 50-minute time slots.
There are two things to remind yourself:
1) You not getting a bid does not mean nobody wanted you, it just means the system didn’t benefit you.
2) While Greek Life can be very beneficial both socially and academically, you must remember that 90 percent of this campus is not affiliated with Greek Life and many of them are happy. You’ll find your place, the feelings of being wanted will totally outweigh the feelings of rejection and you’ll feel proud.