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A zombie apocalypse is a horrifying, yet fictional event that has been portrayed in horror movies for decades. A “Humans vs. Zombies” apocalypse at Binghamton University is an equally horrifying, yet non-fictional event that happens every year on campus.

I’m talking about the bizarre skirmish currently in progress on campus, awkwardly interrupting the lives of unsuspecting students.

As if childhood cops-and-robbers fights weren’t enough, the game has evolved into a version found exhilarating by toddlers, young children and most recently, college students.

In the game, zombies are represented by a neon headband while humans are portrayed by neon armbands. If it was socially acceptable, I’m sure the players of the game would be willing to show up to class in full facial makeup while dragging a bloody leg behind them.

As immature as it is, it may be humorous and even exciting to daydream about what you would do and how you would act if a zombie apocalypse actually took place. I’m no expert, but I can assure you that a barrage of marshmallows and socks would do minimal damage.

Nerf guns, on the other hand, are obviously a different story. In such an epic battle of survival it becomes clear that Nerf rifles can solve all zombie-related problems.

Of course if the weaponry of the humans fails, zombies can be seen biting the humans. The “zombies” physically bite the clothing of the “human” players. I have no doubt that this must seem insane to everyone. This is, of course, unless I am somehow the only delusional lunatic in a world of normal people.

I’m going to at least assume that the interest with zombies and the idea of a post-apocalyptic Earth is due to the never-ending zombie craze displayed within cinema.

“Resident Evil,” “28 Days Later,” “Dawn of the Dead,” “I am Legend” and “Land of the Dead” are all movies that were less derived from other movies with the exact same plots. This is a hasty comparison, but there aren’t exactly hundreds of original plots resulting from the idea of dead people eating flesh.

In addition to the list of fantasies currently spawning on campus, there are times when students may even see pseudo-violent battles of pseudo-magical proportions.

This is regarding an even more exponentially disturbing event on campus known as LARP, or Live Action Role Play. These are the warriors who prance through our campus’ greenery wielding plastic weaponry, wearing Robin Hood’s entire wardrobe and listening to the “Safety Dance” on repeat.

People shouldn’t have to walk around campus in constant fear of being whacked by a plastic sword or hit by a catapulted ball of Styrofoam. Thankfully, I had my anti-insanity cloak to prevent any inadvertent attacks.

Despite the listed critiques, a great freedom on campus is the ability to start almost any organization you can think of. Students have the right to do whatever they please, and I’ve always supported that, whether or not I agree with the methods by which they fulfill their goals. What it really comes down to is the way people wish to spend their time while they’re in college and not yet in the working world.

Of course, this is unless your working world consists of playing Aladdin at Disney World, which, from what I hear, pays in gum.