Nothing can ruin a new pair of heels faster than a bitchy attitude — or walking anywhere on Front Street. Really. Bitchiness is extremely off-putting.

Assertiveness, however, is damn sexy. But beware of the fine line between the two. Fortunately for you, I’ll be holding your hand, and your ugly heels, throughout this tight-rope walk.

So first thing’s first — are there really any perks to being a wallflower? If shy guys finish last, are quiet girls also looked past? It seems in today’s world assertiveness is a prerequisite to life.

Because of this expectation, more timid girls are stepping out of their shells and embracing the world. But will they, and their unshelled bodies, be embraced back?

Hell yeah. At least by somebody. Even if society at large doesn’t accept you for putting yourself out there, the people who matter will. It’s better to be the person who is shot down for standing up than the person leaning on the wall for support.

It’s less and less about what people look like or what they make; it’s more about what they take.

Take your time. Take your share. Take your stake in life.

That’s what assertiveness is all about, taking what you want. But taking what you want doesn’t mean taking what other people need — like respect, love and kindness.

If getting what you want means walking all over someone else, you’ve stepped into bitchy territory. And if we were to really break it down, we’re not really taking, but merely receiving what we’ve given up.

Too many people are overly selfless, and they always put others before themselves. They give, give and give until they are sewing clothes to put on their back just to take them off and give them away. Sadly, I was one of these people. Until college.

Once I got to college I realized that I was being walked all over, and the footprints on my face led right to my friends. If I bent that easily with people I was comfortable with, how much would I waver with my enemies?

And by enemies, I mean everyone that disagrees with my taste in music, food, favorite colors and sugar-free gum.

I began to understand that being passive-aggressive did not give me a secret form of power any more than my overly sharp canine teeth. They are both useless when it comes to raw meat.

Instead of making snide comments, I wanted to start standing up and become my own advocate. I wanted to be able to h