For anyone who has hooked up Downtown, it’s pretty easy to relate to “Whatsername” by Green Day. Alright, maybe not the whole song, but the line, “I remember the face, but I can’t recall the name,” is pretty relevant. You met, you swapped saliva and you parted ways. You don’t know each other, but it’s pretty safe to say that you wanted something more.
So how will you handle this delicate situation? How will you go forth and conquer love? We can’t guarantee happily ever after, but we encourage you to try.
If you have their number, great! You’ve saved yourself a lot of leg work. Texting them a simple “Sup,” should let them know that that specific bar hookup was different than the rest. If that doesn’t work, try writing them a love poem in Iambic pentameter and send it over. It should be at least 24 lines long, 30 if you want them to think you are serious. If they don’t respond within 24 hours with a poem of their own, they aren’t worth thy time anyway.
If you don’t have their number, don’t fret. With some extra effort, true love will prevail. Try to recall any facts that you know about them. Did they tell you about club soccer? Were you thrilled by their adventurous a cappella experiences? These are great jumping off points. Find a friend who is involved in those clubs, and try describing the person to them. If you can’t describe them well enough, take a trip to the local arts and crafts store, buy a full-size canvas, and paint a giant Impressionist portrait of your lover.
By this point, your friend should be able to identify your future significant other. Here is where social media becomes important. Look them up on Facebook and casually send them a cool “Hey.” Once they respond with a “Hey you ;),” send them the same poem you would have sent them in step one. Who knows what can happen when you let bar love blossom? Remember to invite the Release editors to your wedding!