Eddie Ifft Polarizes Audience at Late Nite

The comedic stylings of Eddie Ifft had some Binghamton University students rolling in laughter, while others left miffed Saturday night.

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“America’s dirtiest comedian” held true to his title within the first five minutes of his set, using the f-word as every part of speech imaginable and telling the audience that he believes his name sounds “like a slow-leaking fart.”

He also added that he was more excited to do a show at Penn State, where he could make molestation jokes, instead of being in Binghamton, the country’s fifth most depressing city.

“I heard Binghamton is the fifth most depressing city in the country, which is weird because it’s the fourth most depressed I have ever been,” Ifft said.

Ifft catered to the college crowd in the Undergrounds Coffeehouse, telling the audience he doesn’t smoke pot, he eats it.

“I had a bad experience once,” Ifft began. “I ate a pot cookie. And, let me tell you something about eating pot — it opens doors that never close. I got so high and so paranoid that I went onto Yahoo Answers and typed in ‘I just ate a pot cookie, how long am I gonna be high?’ First answer back: ‘probably forever.’ Not the best thing to tell someone who’s already paranoid.”

He had the audience in the palm of his hand, but then took a decidedly crass route when he started in on several jokes about suicide despite protests from the audience. After that, much of the audience was lost, his jokes started to fall flat and people walked out.

Ifft sensed the crowd’s shift in attitude and wanted to be reassured that BU wasn’t a religious school.

“We’ve got the politically correct crowd here tonight,” Ifft said. “You guys don’t laugh at jokes that I love, that I tell everywhere.”

He saved himself toward the end of his set with humorous stories of the homeless people in his neighborhood and a short quip about cops.

“I saw a cop the other day and I thought the same thing I always do when I see a cop: I could get that gun!” Ifft said.

Arguably, the three BU student comedians from the Binghamton University Stand Up Comedy Club who opened for Ifft fared better with the audience. Jeremy Kaplowitz made jokes about Jews (he’s allowed, he is one), Mike Amory educated the audience on his porn habits and Darian Lusk kept it classy with some high-brow humor.

Editor’s Note: Release Editor Darian Lusk was not involved in the publication of this article.