When I thought about what I wanted to write for my senior column, I looked back at a blog post my mom wrote almost four years ago: “I find myself preparing for change. I am taking my oldest child to college on Wednesday; this is her freshman year.”
She authored this as I was beginning my college experience at Binghamton University. I remember reading this column and feeling thoroughly upset. I didn’t like the idea of moving away from home, a place where I felt comfortable and content. I was nervous about making new friends and leaving behind the old ones. The idea of change never sat well with me and to be completely honest, it still doesn’t.
I cried almost the whole drive up to Binghamton on the day I left for school. The fear of what was lying ahead was what truly scared me.
The truth is, I really had nothing to worry about. If only I had known about the amazing people I would meet and the wonderful memories I would make in my four years at Binghamton, then maybe I wouldn’t have been so fearful.
Today, just as I did before my freshman year, I find myself preparing for change yet again. I feel similarly to how I did then. Just as I cried then, I cry now, not wanting to leave the place that has become so near and dear to my heart. The comfort I felt in my hometown when I left to come to Binghamton is now the same as what I feel as I prepare to leave.
The difference now is that I feel more confident moving forward, instead of being afraid of what lies ahead of me. The experiences I’ve had and the people I’ve met here have prepared me for my future endeavors, whatever they may be. The feelings of joy and moments of laughter within these years far outweigh the tears and the fear I felt before them, so I am confident that sadness I feel now will fade as I begin to embrace my next chapter.
I will hold all of the memories I have made and friends I have met close to my heart. I want to thank those friends for opening up their hearts to me and for being patient with me as my shyness faded. Thank you for the heart to hearts, the laughs and the shoulders to cry on. You are all the reason Binghamton has felt like home these past four years.
I would also like to thank my family for their endless encouragement and for always being a phone call away. You have and always will make moments of change feel a little bit easier for me. I love you all so much.
Lastly, I would like to thank Binghamton University. I was unsure of you when I first arrived, but I am truly thankful for the education I’ve received and the memories I’m leaving with. I’m more than happy that I chose to come to school here and could not have imagined a better four years.
Aleza Leinwand is a senior majoring in art and design.